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77 Myths of Venerable Magik

by Cara Neir / Infernal Legions of Mordor

supported by
Jordan Vauvert
Jordan Vauvert thumbnail
Jordan Vauvert Cara Neir, c'est tout ou rien, sachant que "rien" ne fait pas partie du vocabulaire du groupe. Alors c'est toujours tout.
77 Myths of Venerable Magik, c'est une vaste blague c'est un split qui enterre le format du split, qui fait rentrer soixante-dix-sept (!!!) pistes en même pas une demi-heure. Et pas d'escroquerie : Cara Neir y va à fond, pousse le vice jusqu'à écrire de bonnes paroles ; quant à Infernal Legions of Mordor, ils jouent le cybergrind le plus excentrique que j'ai pu entendre ! Favorite track: Skimpy Solomon Fartfingers.
YomaBarr
YomaBarr thumbnail
YomaBarr Aka "How To Bring An Album To The Strict Top of Everybody's Most Played In Just a Couple of Spins" 😂😂😂 I grinn(d)ed like an idiot too. This is so, so stupid. Love it!
Will be great for my summer bike rides 🤣
j-kep
j-kep thumbnail
j-kep This is about as silly as albums come and it’s frankly ridiculous how much fun it is. I grinned like an idiot. These thumbs are up!

PS fuck NSBM Favorite track: Skimpy Solomon Fartfingers.
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  • Cassette + Digital Album

    77 Tales of Venerable Magik on Left Hand Path Tapes in VHS case with zine & additional art. Audio cassette tape inside.

    Includes unlimited streaming of 77 Myths of Venerable Magik via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Trve Black Metal Hails Edition
    Cassette + Digital Album

    Foul Orc Piss Tapes with Trve Black Metal alternate artwork.

    Includes unlimited streaming of 77 Myths of Venerable Magik via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

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1.
Use a phrase like "castration of faulty designs", it's true Make sure to have your demo as raw as possible I want hexes thrown, Omega Satan disembowel I'll summon demons and cast spells and stuff Whatever it takes to be the most evil of evil I'll be so evil And I'm really fucking mad I didn't get my free dinner at Luby's
2.
The interbutt sleuths are at it again, reject the Nazi kvlt lords Find a surprise ambient blackdoom project a year later under the moniker "King Strife" Release one demo then make another new project five months later You're still a Nazi Can you tell me what the inside of a colon looks like with your head so far up your ass?
3.
Maybe we should make a Dungeon Synth project next Chug IPA and use Casio presets Release a deliberately limited cyan maroon tape Is this what it takes to be a cool metal band? Fuck We're more mystic than you because we only record during rainstorms and caterpillar evolution
4.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, RUH Open up, ground! Cataclysmic event, arise! All frosted over, frozen Ice cicles crash into skulls, frozen Chaos entwined with death and destruction Eager ears waiting for instructions on what to worship Body hopping parasitic scum fuck scrambling to the next Skin oozing black from booger-colored lesions Buckets full of these morons, all in the mixer at once Grinding their bones, crunching nom nom Stupid idiot fuck head Derivative "work of art" here we come!
5.
We listened to it, more than once We thought about it, more than we should We like you, you're cool dude I think it's pretty safe to say Your band sucks
6.
Woooooah! The end of the end was only the beginning Fucking everything up its stupid ass I'm gonna kick your stupid garage door with my boots You fricken bum head I'm gonna shake you like some maracas Gonna need a different face piece when I'm done with yours Cause I'm coming at you like a slow loris So what if my favorite shirts are the same from freshman year Fucking everything up its stupid ass I put the tough in tough and ough and ugggghhhh I eat the kiwi skin too, whole fruit Boy you know the turkey tender, get out of my face dude man bro
7.
On my Ultralight shit Button-up short sleeve, moisture wicking, of course it's Colombia Fuck Patagucci Extra-wide brim oilskin Duck back my whole getup and get Mr. Marston with a ferro rod hip Sparked a fire, cooked a burg and made this hit 40 liter pack with my bros, fuck no you can't go On the same stream brown cleans, I mainstream brown beans On the same stream a bear is cleaning himself, I'm drinking coffee
8.
Solomon Fingers, son of the Goldfish King Heir of Chubby Chamber, was born a prodigy "One day when you grow up boy, you'll cover this whole town with your Farts You'll be the king, but the throne will not wait so patiently until then..." Solomon Fingers, son of the Goldfish King Heir of Chubby Chamber, was born a prodigy Solomon sought the amulet and knew what he must do with it See, to harness the Fart, one has to seek the cheese... Fromunda Fromunda was once known to render entire villages defenseless, weeping from the noxious fumes Solomon Fingers got that amulet just in time, literally as Fromunda farted its way through town Farting out farts and farting x7 Really gassing up the place when the amulet began to glow yellow, cracking open into a big ass boiled egg, And hopping into Solomon's mouth, producing the largest, nastiest farts ever smelt, ever dealt Solomon Fingers really grew up to be a big ol' turd burglar
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about

Additional copies: infernallegionsofmordor.bandcamp.com/merch

Our side written & produced in September 2021.

credits

released May 6, 2022

Cover Art by Mauvewand
Calligraphy by Morgan Smith

Cara Neir 1-8
Chris F. - Vocals, Lyrics
Garry B. - Guitars, Bass, Drum Programming, Backing Vocals, Synths, Sampling

Infernal Legions of Mordor 9-77
Songwriting:
Rhys: 11, 17-19, 23, 25, 26, 35, 49, 52.
Donny: 28, 57, 71, 74.
Morgan Smith: 31.
Randall Minick: 71.
Peter Is Dead: 68.
Matt “Peavy” Perrin: 59.
Alice Johansson: 31.
Bad Boy Nick Nick: 36.
Donny & Will: 57

Guest Vocals:
Shitattack: 31, 39, 47
Dylan Walker: 20, 24, 58, 73, 77

Spoken word:
Track 11: Rhys, Donny & Will
Track 15: Will
Track 29: Savannah Locke, Jayne Clark, Mauvewand, Mokka,
Track 33: Texas Mike, Esq
Track 42: Axel Severs, Savannah Locke, Good Boy Nick Gramsas, Cade Bundrick, Caleb Lewis, Will
Track 57: Savannah Locke, Matt “Peavey” Perrin, Dylan Walker

Matt “Peavey” Perrin performs the backing music on Track 49.

Bass recorded by Rubio Narcotico

Infernal Legions of Mordor is:
Die Ført, Thy Enginner øv Chaøs: Drum Programming, Synths and Recording
Thoros, The Foul Wizard of the Plains: Bass and Synths
Infernal Commander, Lord Würm: Vocals, Some Bass, and Arrangements

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Cara Neir Dallas

2008-2024 arlington, tx.

chris francis
garry brents

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